Coffee. Joe. Java. Mud. Whatever you call it, we all know what it means. Everyone knows about one person that simply cannot function without their first cup of coffee in the morning. We are a group of people that cannot function without coffee, so coffee has a slightly different meaning for us.

Progammer (noun.): A machine that turns coffee into code

Coffee is our fuel. We cannot function without it. Coffee is so important to us that the first thing we teach a new employee is how to make the coffee. The first thing we give a new employee, visitor or passing stranger, is a cup of coffee. The importance of coffee at Rabbitania cannot be understated. It is important enough to have a set of rules that govern the precious elixir and the wonderful machine that creates it. These Rules are the only written down, codified and ratified rules we have and live by.

Rabbit Coffee Etiquette
Thinking about coffee automatically makes us think about our cup. The cup that was given to you, with your name on the bottom, the cup that bears your rabbit-self. The loss of a cup has led to heartfelt pleas for its safe return, in-depth investigations and ultimately the reunion of Rabbit and cup, which was in the cupboard all along.

Although everyone knows and understands the importance of coffee, we understand that without coffee, you are not really a person, you barely remember your own name, and this is why we have the subtle reminder that if you are the first person to the office in the morning, it is you duty and privilege to brew the first pot. (I assume the note was written when the second person came to the office and found there was no coffee.)

Reminder sticky note: First man/wo throught the door = makes coffee

In the years of Retro’s existence, the process for creating coffee has been perfected. The perfect cup of coffee is created by adhering to the Rules. Varying from the Rules creates a shockwave of anger, outrage and fear in all true Rabbits, which leads us to the bone chilling cinnamon incident, or cinnamoncident, if you will. The day that some cinnamon flavoured coffee was found near the heart of our office. A picture of the offending substance was posted to Slack and set off the shock-wave that had even offsite Rabbits up in arms. We still do not know who is responsible, and we do not know if the machine was corrupted, but just mentioning the possibility sends a shiver down my spine. Legend has it that the cinnamon coffee is still lurking, and biding its time.

Coffee is our fuel. We use it to get us going in the morning, we use it get to know our fellows, we use it to show we care, and in some cases we use it as bribes to get advice on that one piece of code that just isn’t doing what it is supposed to. However you drink it, and no matter how much of it you drink, there will always be a cup or two or three for you at Rabbitania.